


The Kitten Cam Songbook

by Fizzgig (Glowbug)



Category: The Critter Room (Blog)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-08
Updated: 2017-10-29
Packaged: 2018-02-12 07:45:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2101395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glowbug/pseuds/Fizzgig
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Perhaps, when kittens sing the songs of their people... these are the songs they sing. (Perhaps.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. If You'z Happeh and You Knowz It

If you’z happeh and you knowz it whap your paws! (whap whap)  
If you’z happeh and you knowz it whap your paws! (whap whap)  
If you’z happeh and you knowz it den your tail will surely showz it  
If you’z happeh and you knowz it whap your paws! (whap whap)  
  
If you’z happeh and you knowz it give a purr! (purr purr)  
If you’z happeh and you knowz it give a purr! (purr purr)  
If you’z happeh and you knowz it den your tail will surely showz it  
If you’z happeh and you knowz it give a purr! (purr purr)  
  
If you’z happeh and you knowz it shout “mewray!” (MEWRAY!)  
If you’z happeh and you knowz it shout “mewray!” (MEWRAY!)  
If you’z happeh and you knowz it den your tail will surely showz it  
If you’z happeh and you knowz it shout “mewray!” (MEWRAY!)


	2. Fence Music (Hail Chickenfish)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To the tune of "Joy to the World/Jeremiah Was a Bullfrog" by Three Dog Night.

Daddy John wuz a hoomin!  
Wuz a good friend of mine!  
Ai neber understood a single “no” he said  
But ai played wif him all da time  
Cuz ai lubs to play all da time  
  
Singin'  
Hail Chickenfish  
All da kittens sing, now  
Hail to da many mousies dat we see  
Hail to you and me  
  
If ai wuz da king of da world  
Tell you what ai'd do  
Ai'd hiss at all da cars and da dogs and da jobs  
An’ cuddle all day wif you!  
  
Singin'  
Hail Chickenfish  
All da kittens sing, now  
Hail to da many mousies dat we see  
Hail to you and me  
  
You know ai lubs Da Bird toys  
Lubs to have mai purrs  
I'z a cheeto pouncer an’ a furst-class mouser  
I’z a fast-zoomin' blur of da fur  
Yes, I’z a fast-zoomin' blur of da fur!  
  
Singin'  
Hail Chickenfish  
All da kittens sing  
Hail to da many mousies dat we see  
Hail to you and me  
  
Hail Chickenfish  
All da kittens sing, now  
Hail to da many mousies dat we see  
Hail to you and me!  
MEW!


	3. O Kitmas Tree

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> To the tune of "O Christmas Tree," as you might imagine. (For those wondering, the Kitmas Tree is a relatively new toy that looks like a spiral tree/party hat. With a red-eyed mouse on top.)

O Kitmas Tree, O Kitmas Tree,  
Why is your mouse so creepy?

O Kitmas Tree, O Kitmas Tree,  
Why is your mouse so creepy?

It stares us down with eyes of red,  
Not merely toy, but source of dread!

O Kitmas Tree, O Kitmas Tree,  
Why is your mouse so creepy?


	4. Back in the Catnoe Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> To the tune, I believe, of "Back in the Saddle Again."
> 
> Lyrics for this one written by kitten cam chatter AmeliaCatheart! They were too brilliant not to be preserved.
> 
> To be sung by Shelby's kitten Lizzie, the incredibly smart and incredibly scampy stripey kitten.

I'm back in the catnoe agin'.

Even when I lose I still win.

Everything I try turns out good I don't know why. 

I'm back in the catnoe agin'.

 

I'm tryin' real hard not to gloat 

pretending to sleep in this boat. 

You know I'm the best at being mama's pest. 

Yes, I'm back in the catnoe agin'!


	5. Escape Plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another ditty by the brilliant AmeliaCatheart. Tune presently unknown!

In the catnoe I am smiling

while my brain works at compiling

all the routes of exit filing through my head.

 

You may think that I am napping,

but in fact I'm busy mapping

out another great escape from here instead.

**Author's Note:**

> No offense is meant to the original songs or artists thereof. This is strictly parody/fanwork/good fun. :)


End file.
